To the mothers who have lost children, my heart is with you today. I am one of you. I believe that upon the death of a child, our first instinct is to die immediately. It was mine. I think it is the natural response to the unthinkable, unnatural reversal of order. We want to put it right.
Nothing I could find explained the unnatural error that the death of a child presupposes. There were no answers for me in psychiatry or religion. Not even the love of my daughters could ease the pain. But I was lucky to have them. I have two friends whose only children have died. At her daughter’s funeral, one of them asked me, “Am I still a mother?” “Oh, yes,” I said, “She is just…over there.” By that time, things had happened to me.
A little book fell into my hand one day and reading it opened a door into the world of spirit. I began a long search and over the years, I found answers I couldn’t have dreamed of on my own, and they didn’t come in the way I expected. Nothing miraculous does. I came to understand that contrary to everything I believed, the Universe, or Whatever Life Force it is that takes care of us, was kind and loving. I learned that death is temporary and that life is all there is. I was presented with evidence that my child continued beyond the event called death and that I was loved beyond my understanding, as was he.
To the mothers who have lost children, I extend my unassailable belief that there is something waiting for you, some great Love that will give you strength and courage. It may come in the form of little signs, little evidences, that your child is beside you, loving you still, loving you more. And that will change you. There may be sudden insights that will teach you how to live and be happy. Trust your intuition. Pay no attention to the naysayers. What do they know? There are things in this world and in other worlds that they cannot dream of.
And to the children whose mothers have entered into spirit, as mine has, and especially to Martha’s children, I send you the same message on this Mother’s Day, of hope, of a belief in life, and the certain knowledge that one day you will sense your mother near, if you haven’t already. When it happens, you will know it. It will feel like love, for it is love that continues after the thing called death. It will make itself known. Love speaks to us in small ways, in light touches, in gentle messages from our loved ones in spirit, because Nobody’s Gone for Good.
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Read The Messenger: The Improbable Story of a Grieving Mother and a Spirit Guide by Helen Delaney. It may be found at www.Amazon.com and on her new website: www.themessenger.space
Hi Helen. I’ve been unable to comment on this essay. Last weekend we were traveling from Virginia to Ohio and back for a graduation, a visit with my cousin and finally to pick up our new puppy. I didn’t expect to be overwhelmed with grief on Sunday but of course that is what happened. I read your essay and cried all day. Nothing consoled me. Nothing mattered at all. We got home late Monday night. I drove a lot and that seemed to help. I feel better this week. So most of it has passed at least for awhile. Enough about me. I been wondering what happened on the visit to your aunt and your brother coming to Cambridge. Is the move going to happen? And now with today’s news are things falling into place? I’m wondering. Please let me know how you are doing. I’d love to see you again. Perhaps in June. Unless of course you are on your way. In any event, please keep in touch❤️. Gini
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Thank you, Gini, for all your lovely messages.
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